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Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Does a bear shit in the woods?
This and other life changing questions answered on today's...
Journeys with Nonny Nu.

Oh, joyous day!! I know, it's Wednesday and I haven't posted a blog entry for my Saturday hike yet. Shame on me, but I've honestly been swamped with work (I even had to work on the weekend). I've already received complaint(s) from at least one person, which could possibly be Stillman. But, you know, nowadays, anything is possible.

Anyhow, as I was saying, oh, joyous day!! Stillman and I were graced with Mr. Nonny Nu's presence on Sunday when we visited Memorial Park. (I played sherpa to Mr. Nonny Nu.) I was very excited to go on this hike because I skipped last weekend (due to the recent No Hiking By Yourself Decree that was seconded by several readers *roll eyes*). I even printed out color packets of information, including a description of the hike and the map but there were no takers.

On that beautiful foggy morning, we set off on the Memorial Park Trail. It was inadvertantly apropos, since the park is dedicated to the veterans of WWI. We started off on a fire road, which was wide enough for all three of us.

We three stood at attention as the Banana Slugs Memorial Day Parade passed before us. (Okay, the previous sentence is most certainly true if you take into consideration Einstein's Theory of Relativity.) It was a dewey morning, so it's no wonder that we had a great turn out of banana slugs. Boy, was it dewey! Just look at all that dew! (Happy now, Stillman? SHEESH!)

It was a beautiful day, with much opportunity for contemplation. Soon, the fire road narrowed and the trail became sketchy. I thought, "Where's the trail?" So, I kept looking at the map and hike description to make sure we weren't lost. As we went deeper and deeper into the woods, we saw all sorts of stuff. We saw artsy fartsy trees, and Christmas trees. There were trees with vines running through them, and twisty trees. There was also a freaky tree that had like fifty branches coming out of it.

But, we didn't just see trees, we also saw flowers. There were ferns that I had never seen before. There were wild lilacs and white wild flowers. We saw a gigantic mushroom attached to a tree, and a lot of blackberry bushes. Stillman gave the go ahead, so I ate a blackberry.

I started hallucinating and thought that centipedes were crawling all over me.

Okay, I'm just kidding. The blackberry was delicious. As you can see, there were several blackberries available for consumption, but I was only offered ONE. That is why I laughed long and hard when Stillman got slimed by some mysterious foam that was all over the plants. But, then, my comeuppance was mercilessly handed to me when I got wacked with an errant thorn whip. Okay, so maybe that isn't the proper name of that plant, but that is in fact how it worked. Just look at how overgrown this trail is! Since I was wearing shorts, I ate it pretty bad. My leg was tingly all over, like the thorns had burrowed into my muscle and was squirming around. Dr. Stillman then administered some Claritin and told me to not scratch at it. It worked! Because after 48 hours of feeling like I was carrying a pissed off porcupine inside my leg, I'm all better now.

Soon enough, we started to ascend Mt. Ellen. Along the way, the trail widened and we passed some very Shire-looking panorama. Finally, we got to the top, and all we had to show for it was a wooden sign. So, we headed down the hill and back to our starting point.

I paid attention during the hike and I can tell you with 100% accuracy that, no, a bear does not shit in the woods. Well, at least this one didn't.

10 comments:

Stillman said...

Nice dew shots! I tossed the other blackberries, which were not ripe. I should have let you eat them. SHEESH.

el bastardo said...

neat pics (although it'd be nice to occasionally see an actual human face, ass freak). while they really do remind me just how nice the day was, the full story remains untold. first, that caterpillar isn't gonna bite you! pick it up and pet it. second, stillman and i saw--and i kid you not--wild forest lesbians. i couldn't believe it! i was gonna stop and talk with them (purely for research) when out of nowhere a kwisatz haderach voice demands, "keep walking, pie-hole shut, head down." thank goodness stillman was there to snap me out of it (hard kick to the pant-seat), but by the time i realized what had happened we were down the happy trail.

Man from U.N.C.L.E. said...

Nonny Nu - I really think you have a knack for Nature photagraphy. Most of those photos are spectacular. I am especially fascinated by the last dew shot. It gives the illusion that the drops are suspended in air. Great pictures.

Nonny Nu said...

GAH! I think Freelance Midget has started an unhealthy and aesthetically unpleasing trend of long blog entry titles (click the "Post Comment" link to see what I'm talking about).

Anywhoo, if Mr. Nonny Nu wants his mug posted all over the Internet, then so be it. The next hike photos will feature Mr. Nonny Nu and his face. When you lose your anonymity and girls all over the Silicon Valley fawn over you as you play your Les Paul in the nude on our backyard deck, don't come crying to me, mister.

Man From U.N.C.L.E., thanks so much for the compliments! Actually, it's not really me, or the camera. You see, my camera sucks. I am having trouble focusing whenever I want a close up on a flower. And, the colors look a bit faded. This time around, I actually fiddled with the brightness setting on my Microsoft Photo Editor before I posted these. I basically adjusted the brightness down 5 points for each photo (most of them). For a few, I added 3-5 points contrast. But what you are seeing is Bill Gates' handywork and not mine, sadly.

Freelance Midget said...

NN, why wasn't i invited to bestow my goat-ish skills on your traveling party? i'm insulted.

Anonymous said...

"When you lose your anonymity and girls all over the Silicon Valley fawn over you as you play your Les Paul in the nude on our backyard deck, don't come crying to me, mister."

if i start playing my les paul nude out on our back deck, many things will happen, but silicon valley girls fawning over me will not be one of them.

Nonny Nu said...

NN, why wasn't i invited to bestow my goat-ish skills on your traveling party? i'm insulted.
You know what? Honest to goodness, that thought never even crossed my mind. I hate to say it because it sounds like I'm a bad auntie but, dang, I just didn't even think of you the whole time!!

el bastardo said...

wow, i can't see any reason why she'd feel left out over that. [insert eye-roll here]

Cl. Panic said...

Maybe we need to introduce NN to Macro mode. Or, as one of my friends calls it, the "flower thingy setting".

Nonny Nu said...

Dude, I know about the flower thingy setting and when I run into a whole lot of trouble everytime I use it. They should have made it the grass thingy setting or the leaf thingy setting instead because those are the things my camera focuses on whenever I put it on the flower thingy setting.