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Happy Birthday, Willy Wonka!

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Thursday, January 31, 2008

Will Viola make it?

Shoot, 32 and I still haven't learned to control myself. One thing that I have never learned was how to leave well enough alone. You know, it's well and good to want to improve things, but why do I always seem to choose a needlessly extravagant "improvement" that many times seems to worsen the situation?? I have no idea. You guys have all been in my shoes before. I know it can't just be me.

Today, I thought that Viola looked a bit soil-deficient. (Yes, yes, I know I haven't updated her photos since last September.) So, instead of just adding some soil to the top of her pot like a normal person would do, I decide to re-pot her and give her a brand new set of soil. Well, little did I know that her roots had woven through all of the existing soil, so it was next to impossible for me to get rid of the old soil so that I could give her new soil. In the end, I just added a little bit of new soil to the sides of the pot and the top of the pot (like I should have done in the first place). But now, I'm not sure if the old girl is going to live through all that rummaging through her roots.

You know, I had nothing but the best intentions for her. But, this isn't the only time this (i.e., screwing up when all I wanted to do was help) has happened to me. In fact, I usually have nothing but the best intentions whenever I set out to improve a situation. I really think that my rate of success is disproportionately low for the amount and degree of good intent I have. The world would be such a happier place if good intentions is all that was needed. Why, practically everything I do would be a hit. GAH--that totally sucks, people!!

...there's more to this story--click me!

Calendars are finally here!

Yes! The anointed day has finally arrived. Those of you who work at Nu Nu & Nu, LLP, have received your calendars. If you are not in your office today, *cough*GreenThumbsMcGillicuttyisslackingoffagain*cough*, I have set them on your chairs. Also included are TWoNN post-it notes!!

These calendars are limited editions. I have only printed 25. They will be worth a lot of pesos on Antique Road Show in a few centuries. So, hang on to them! I originally wanted to send these to TWoNN participants and loyal readers for Christmas presents, but I couldn't get them done in time. Sorry for the delay--we are already on the last day of January. But, they are on their way now.

Please remember, whatever you do, DO NOT FLIP FORWARD TO FUTURE MONTHS UNTIL THEY ARRIVE!

...there's more to this story--click me!

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Deep Tissue Massage

...there's more to this story--click me!

Friday, January 25, 2008

Walking Pneumonia: The NEW South Beach Diet


Those of us who are healthy as horses must be resigned to the fact that any weightloss program is going to be hard won and will require us to actually do something instead of just sitting around and withering away. Take yours truly, for instance. Many of you know that I've been trying to keep up my 3 days per week running routine. I've done that for the past three weeks, but it's so hard to get out and do it, especially when it's raining and the sun goes down like at 3:30 in the afternoon.

But, take a look at Man from U.N.C.L.E. Did you know that he lost 12 pounds in a matter of a few weeks? All without lifting a finger. He calls it "walking pneumonia." We should all be so lucky. According to a lung specialist at the Mayo Clinic, walking pneumonia isn't severe enough to require bed rest or hospitalization. I really don't see how this is an illness. Seems like a rather extravagant diet plan. Anywhoo, if you're out there, Man from U.N.C.L.E., down another Mycoplasma pneumoniae for me!

...there's more to this story--click me!

What the holy hell happened last night??

Last night, I had to pull an all-nighter at work. Wasn't fun, but at least I wasn't the only one. So, I get back to the house at around 7:15 this morning. Mr. Nonny Nu had mentioned that Kash had prodigious "droppings" yesterday, but I was not prepared for it. The air was still and heavy. Kinda moist, and not in a good way.

There are two litter boxes, one to the left and the other to the right of the door inside the laundry area. I pushed open the door, went in, and spotted Mount St. Helens in the left litter box. It was still smoldering. The poopy wasn't covered, so I know it was Skillet and not Kash. Everytime I see them poop, she just leaves it uncovered. He always covers his stuff up. If she were a person, she'd be one of those people who don't flush. She's just that way. She is so not ladylike, it's not even funny. And, her mouth always smells like she just ate a pterodactyl, so when she cleans herself, her entire body smells like ass. It's like someone just flipped her inside-out, like a shirt--a shirt worn by a sweaty septic tank. Anyhow, it was a huge dump. I'm talking huge. It was bigger than her head. If someone were to ask, "Hey, guess who took a dump huger than their head?," I would be surprised. But, if forced to guess, I'd guess Skillet. That's just the way she rolls.

So, I get to cleaning the litter box out. I scoop it out and twisty tie the bag. I get another bag to get the smaller droppings. But, why does it still reek? Ah, I check out the other litter box, which has yet another and similarly sized cat paddy. Okay, fine. So, I bend down to scoop that one up. Right at that moment, I hear what sounded like a whoopie cushion going off behind me. I turn around, and there she is copping a squat and dropping off yet another package. I looked at her, but she just kept reading her imaginary newspaper.

For those of us who are counting, the three droppings weighed a total of 1.7 pounds. Skillet weighs about 4.5 pounds. So, she pooped over a third of her weight in one day.

But you know what? I wouldn't trade her in for anything.

...there's more to this story--click me!

Saturday, January 19, 2008

T-Shirt
by MonkeyPig (lazy guest blogger)

Where's my T-shirt.
Did a certain Nonny-Nu Blog administrator said that those who Blog will get a T-shirt??
I have to call my union rep.

...there's more to this story--click me!

Friskies Commercial
by Sushi Cat (Madison Avenue guest blogger)

Hello, everybody!

How are you? I am fine. I have been a very busy kitty. Friskies International recently hired yours truly to film a commercial for them. So, I sat down at a windowsill and tried to figure out what was the best place a kitty could be. I came up with two and couldn't decide which one would be best--at home with the kitty's momma and daddy, or in Pet Paradise. So, being the writer and director of the commercial, I decided to put both in! I found a male model named "Morris" to star in the commercial (he lives next door to me in Pet Paradise), and the rest of my pals also pitched in. Here is the commercial:


Morris as Himself
Written and directed by Sushi Cat
Produced by Cotton Doggie (Mr. Nonny Nu's doggie)
Cinematography by Mr. Jones (Man from U.N.C.L.E.'s kitty)
Sound by Happy (PurpleNiobe's doggie)
Catered by Jennie, Craft Service's PP representative (PurpleNiobe's doggie)
Hair and Makeup by Coco (3-Fish's and Freelance Midget's doggie)
Gaffer...Jazmine (PurpleNiobe's doggie)

...there's more to this story--click me!

Kitty Korner (1/19: Pet Edition)

Today, we have two new pets to introduce. One is my sister's, [insert name here]'s, new pet. Here he is being held by my niece. His name is Scottie:What a cutie pie! He is also known as "Ah Dan" ("egg" in Chinese because he smells eggy). Unfortunately, there's a "gai gai squeezer" at his house (don't ask--I'm too embarrassed to even explain this).

Next up, we have a new installment at the Nu residence. Since I was on vacation for two weeks last Christmas, I brought Stubbie home for the holidays. At first, Mr. Nonny Nu disapproved because he thought I was imprisoning Stubbie against his will. Mr. Nonny Nu even started referring to Stubbie as "Captured." But as the days wore on, Mr. Nonny Nu's heart was stolen as he realized how happy Stubbie was whenever people walked by his bowl and said hello to him. On the day that Stubbie was set to go back to Nu Nu & Nu, LLP (here's Stubbie on his first day back at the office), Mr. Nonny Nu got a fishy of his own. Introducing Charles Waterhammer:
And, here is a video of Chuck enjoying his new home:

Oh, and here is a video of the Backyard Petting Zoo, Possum Division:

Finally, we have our two little love bird kitties, Kash and Skillet. These two are always together. They even do things in unison:



Isn't that crazy?? But, as invididuals, they each have their unique qualities. For example, Skillet will always show her analytical side, which is even more powerful when she turns on her laser beam eyes (she takes after Ca Loc). Here she is on top of Mr. Nonny Nu's amp and checking out a squirrel in the front yard. Kash, on the other hand, is a quiet fellow, who reminds me of the very proper Mr. Darcy.

...there's more to this story--click me!

Friday, January 18, 2008

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MONKEYPIG!*

Here's to wishing you a happy birthday and many more to come. Thanks for being such an awesome sister. You are always there when we need you (me, more than the others, I know), and we can always depend on your practical advice and humor.

*turns head*
*barfs*

Okay, enough gushing...Wow! 40 years old. tsk tsk. That is ANCIENT! MonkeyPig's friends surprised her with a cake today. Here's the birthday girl with her cake. Afterward, they boozed it up at the office as they rocked to the provocative gyrations of the stripper. At the end of all that partying, MonkeyPig was completely out of it and woke up in an unfamiliar place.

*The cakes portrayed in this blog entry are entirely fictional. Any similarity to actual cakes are completely coincidental. The events described, however, are absolutely true.

...there's more to this story--click me!

Saturday, January 12, 2008

It's time to pay up.

Remember when I resolved during the Thanksgiving season to just eat like a pig until the start of the new year when I restart my running regimen? Well, the time has come to make good on the promise. The beginning of the year brought a lot of rains to the Northern California area, and it has began to clear up only recently. So, today, I took my new pedometer out for a little test run. I only did 2 miles, but I think I went at a pretty good clip. Plus, I checked the accuracy of my pedometer every half a mile (one way down to the end of the street is half a mile--Dolly confirmed this). My stride length is 90cm. I'm all set for tomorrow! Coach Nelson will be less upset with me now.

...there's more to this story--click me!

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Happy 80th Birthday to PurpleNiobe!!

Everyone, please join me in wishing a very happy and healthy 80th birthday to PurpleNiobe!

...there's more to this story--click me!

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Hello, Dolly!

We have a new addition to the Nu family--Dolly! She is a 2008 Ford Fusion SEL. Many people (e.g., Coach Nelson, MonkeyPig, etc.) have been expressing reservations about Jolly Green Giant (my old 1995 Infiniti G20), so Mr. Nonny Nu got me Dolly. I am all set to start work tomorrow!

Dolly is a pretty girl. Here's a three-quarter view. Come closah!!* This is what she looks like from the side. Not only does Dolly have a pretty face, she also has a nice ass; definitely not a wide load. Okay, maybe she does have a little junk in the trunk.

But, Dolly isn't just beautiful on the outside. She's also beautiful on the inside. Here she is from the passenger side. Look at that stitching! I love that feature. It really ties in the black interior with the "white suede" exterior. The dash is user friendly, but I don't really need to go there much since there is an automatic climate control (which I have set to 70 degrees) and the steering wheel has the audio controls built in. The instrument panel is pretty cool, imo, and has green backlighting.

Plus, the back seat is pretty comfy. They also fold down, in case I need to haul a giant carrot. And, I love, love, love the moon roof. I think Dolly will be perfect for when I have passengers who need to check their eyeliner, or those pesky backseat drivers, or both!

(Photos of Nonny Nu made possible by my trusty assistant.)

* A la Mr. Hinkie (for South Park fans).

...there's more to this story--click me!

Friday, January 4, 2008

Do you care?

I'm going through the last few days of my two week vacation (I go back to work on Monday), and all I hear about on the news is about the Iowa primary and, now, the New Hampshire primary. Personally, I'm very disinterested this election year. I just don't really have any interest in this and wish that the Twilight Zone marathon would come back on. On top of that, it's a dreary and stormy day outside (video taken from the front door of the Nu residence where there is a small window--check out that wind noise!):



...and it would be so nice to just curl up with something good to watch on TV. I don't know if it has to do with me not keeping up with who's doing what and who's saying what, but I'm just not excited at all about this election or any of the candidates running. Is anyone else feeling this way? Or is it just me?

Oooh! Look at this live-person re-enactment of the Tetris videogame!

...there's more to this story--click me!

Thursday, January 3, 2008

I <3 Vacations

I can't believe that my vacation is almost over. It is now Thursday. I have only four days left. FOUR DAYS. Don't get me wrong. I love my job. But, nothing beats hanging out with my kitties and Mr. Nonny Nu, and watching TV/movies/shows all day. My first week was spent getting ready for Christmas and New Year. Now, I have to get my head on straight for the upcoming week. To make things worse, I just got word that one of my best pals (Dancing Queen) at work is quitting. I will miss her sorely.

==:o<

...there's more to this story--click me!

Music of the Week: Tales of Brave Ulysses (Cream)

Awesome lyrics...


You thought the leaden winter would bring you down forever,
But you rode upon a steamer to the violence of the sun.

And the colors of the sea blind your eyes with trembling mermaids,
And you touch the distant beaches with tales of brave ulysses:
How his naked ears were tortured by the sirens sweetly singing,
For the sparkling waves are calling you to kiss their white laced lips.

And you see a girls brown body dancing through the turquoise,
And her footprints make you follow where the sky loves the sea.
And when your fingers find her, she drowns you in her body,
Carving deep blue ripples in the tissues of your mind.

The tiny purple fishes run laughing through your fingers,
And you want to take her with you to the hard land of the winter.

Her name is aphrodite and she rides a crimson shell,
And you know you cannot leave her for you touched the distant sands
With tales of brave ulysses; how his naked ears were tortured
By the sirens sweetly singing.

The tiny purple fishes run lauging through your fingers,
And you want to take her with you to the hard land of the winter.

...there's more to this story--click me!

Wednesday, January 2, 2008