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Thursday, June 7, 2007

The Motht Hated Profethion
by Man from U.N.C.L.E. (guest blogger)


You know thothial workerth and lawyerth get a bad rap. There'th all kindth of thtereotypeth and bad joketh about people who have chothen thothe careerth. Everybody'th heard them ridiculed ath heartleth thelfith, and thleathy. But ath I thit here typing thith, with immeathurable amountth of thaliva oothing from the corner of my mouth - I've dethided that the real motht hated profethion thould be the dentitht.

Look at him up there^^^^, all wrapped in antitheptic gear, rubber gloveth that go up to hith elbowth, jutht waiting to dig hith little handth into my incredibly overthtretched and gaping mouth, hith whirring thounding toolth of math dethtruction ever ready to inflict inthcrutible pain to even the motht thuthpecting of thweet patientth like me. That'th what I had to fath today, cuth of a thingle cavity that needed fickthing. Now my teeth hurt worth than before. That'th why I believe the dentith ith offithially my motht hated profethion. Can I get a thecond opinion and pleath path the drool cup.

Thee, it wouldn't be tho dethpicable if the dentith would have left me with thome thembelanth of a chanth for otherth to underthtand me - but ath he wath concococting the mythtical potthion he thearched my fath and thaw the fear in my eyeth. He thwifthly moved forward - thrynge in his thweaty gloved up handth and without warning protheeded to thtab my gumth with thith thtrange and incapathitating fluid that may have left me permanently dithabled.

What'th with theth thadithtth? I mean it taketh a thpethial kind of thick to want to thpend 10 hourth a day with your fingerth in thomebody'th nathty mouth, doethn't it? Think of all the timeth theth bothoth are conthtantly plathing their notheth at the rethieving end of the putrid thmell of halitothith. Could you thtomach that?
Thith type of attracthion to the theedy thide of life ith what thetth the dentith up ath the motht hated profethion.

4 comments:

Freelance Midget said...

hahahaha. i wonder if it's true that they have the highest suicide rate.

Nonny Nu said...

Man from U.N.C.L.E., I feel your pain! (Well, actually, no, not really...but you get the idea.) So, are you at work today? Will they understand you when you say, "Cheethe!," or "No cheethe!!"? Mr. Nonny Nu is supposed to go in for some work soon. He's going to have even more to complain about when his complaints are mithunderthtood.

Nonny Nu said...

Freelance Midget, People hating me has never caused me to want to kill myself. Just fyi.

Man from U.N.C.L.E. said...

Yeah, thuckth to be me or them!!! I don't know about thuithide - that may jutht be a mithconthepthion. But if thith kepth up I may invethtigate the perthentage of dentithtth that end up ath homothide vitimth.