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Sunday, March 2, 2008

Husband Pleasin' Beans

Have you ever tried Ranch Style beans? I had never even heard of them until after I met Mr. Nonny Nu. Growing up in Arizona, Nevada, and California, Mr. Nonny Nu is a true son of the Southwest. (You wouldn't think it by looking at him, though.) But, we ran into a problem when we initially tried to procure these beans: the rabbit assigned to get the beans didn't know what they were and the bear who knew what they were only knew them by their old slang name--husband pleasin' beans.

I was sent to the bean aisle at the Sherman Oaks Gelson's for the HPBs. None of the beans were labeled as such. I asked the store clerks but they didn't know. I was so desperate that I asked several of the other women who were walking through the bean aisle. So, there I was, asking everyone walking through there, "Do you know where the husband pleasin' beans are?" Needless to say, I looked and sounded like an Asian idiot in my floral summer dress. On my last try, I asked an old lady, thinking that she had been cooking so long that, if anyone knew, she'd know. Her husband was standing next to her at the moment, and he responded, "Hm. Those sound like something we could use." HAHAHHAHAHHHAHAHHAHA!!! I love old people!!

Anyhow, the proper name for this food item is actually "Ranch Style Beans." The "husband pleasin' beans" nickname derives from an old description that appeared on the label. Nowadays, the manufacturer has switched to "appetite pleasin'."* It is a favorite of many people, some of them Texans and homesick. Even celebrities, like Elizabeth Taylor, Humphrey Bogart, and Grace Kelly have enjoyed them, and of course LBJ, our president from Texas (before the beans were "wussified"). It is a versatile bean, good for putting into chili and also as a side for filet mignon (like the Nus will be doing tonight).

*It's too bad that they got PC-ified and aren't still called husband pleasin' beans because Mr. Nonny Nu really loves them.


MonkeyPig said...

Those beans are good -- not to mention the lard used to make them so good. But, it tastes good with H-burger, hotdogs, F-chicken. Get the ones with the bacon bits. Beans are good. Fortunately I'm not PMS-ing. Otherwise, I'd go to Albertson now and get some of those beans.

Nonny Nu said...

Are you sure you are not confusing these beans with Bush's Baked Beans (Country Style)?

stillman said...

I hope you got some wife-pleasin' beano to go with them.

Man from U.N.C.L.E. said...

NN, you went through the Gelsen's embarrassment story, but please detail all the other embarrassing stories it took to finally discover the Ranch Style Beans. I feel like I need to hear... *dramatic pause* The Rest of The Story.

P.S. I like hear about you being embarrassed.

P.S.S. I think I'll use the "Man Pleasin' Beans" slogan during my next foray to a singles bar.

Nonny Nu said...

Stillman: Wife Pleasin' Beano is a staple at the Nu household. We just have to find it in the cat variety because, nowadays, that's where most of the aroma is coming from.

Man from U.N.C.L.E.: When I went to Gelson's, I just bought a variety of beans, one of which were the Ranch Style beans. Sorry, there isn't any more embarrassment.

Cl. Panic said...

I expect an office tasting this afternoon.

Nonny Nu said...

Expect /= Getting